What Am I Supposed to Do With This?
by MonokuroSora
Summary: Andrew Chen is NOT a girl, and he never ordered any Hetalia units. So why does one show up on his doorstep one afternoon? First Hetalia fanfiction and would love feedback. Probably will eventually have crack in it, so you have been warned.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Okay, so like the 70-something other people who've done this, I'm creating my own Hetalia Unit story. I can't guarantee it'll be as good as others, but I'll try my best to do good! I'll probably not update on a regular basis either, since I have school. But, anyways, I don't own Hetalia- that belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya- and the Hetalia Manuals are all est.1995's (formerly known as LolliDictator). ****Also, even though this story is rated teen, there is mature language. Honestly, I know kids my age who say a lot worse so this doesn't really need to be rated M, does it? If you think so, I'll raise it, but other than swearing and probably some violence later, the story doesn't really have anything in it to need to be rated M. Yeah, so anyways, enjoy!**

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><p>A boy sat alone behind a school building, hidden from the view of other teachers or students if they somehow wandered outside. A cigarette rested between his right index and middle finger, and he was scribbling into a notebook propped up onto his knees. A backpack and a guitar shaped case sat on the grass next to him, and the boy grunted as he continued to work on his calculus homework. Certainly, he was skipping his language arts class to do it, but he was such a teacher's pet that his instructor wouldn't mind. Also, he had been rather stressed lately-more than usual-and had needed to get a hit. The boy sighed, setting his pencil on the notebook and running his now free hand through his unruly bleach blond hair. He took another drag of his cigarette.<p>

"Dammit," He muttered. "This shit is hard."

Andrew Chen was a 16 year old Chinese boy with dark brown eyes and bleached hair that was rather messy. He had several tattoos-one on his left shoulder, one on the right side of his waist, one behind his left ear, and one on his ankle. He had a bellybutton, tongue, and six ear piercings, all of which had been done on the same day-he'd been feeling rather defiant that specific afternoon. And, of course, he'd go home and get yelled at by his parents for making these 'foolish mistakes' and was sometimes even slapped. Andrew had learned long ago how to hide his feelings and tune out his parents-well, any person-when he needed to.

Andrew stashed his notebook and pencil into his bag and swung it over his shoulder. He stood and grabbed his instrument case-holding a shiny black electric bass that was the closest thing he'd found to the love of his life. Andrew headed down the road towards his house, and reached it twenty minutes later, right when the last bell rang at the school and released all the students for the afternoon. Neither of his parent's cars were parked in the driveway, which didn't surprise Andrew one bit. What did surprise him, however, was the huge crate-secured tightly with what looked to be... chains?-sitting with a man standing next to it on his front porch.

"What the fuck is that?" He muttered, and headed towards the man in the light blue delivery suit.

"Can I help you?" Andrew asked, looking at the man closely once he reached him. The company logo on his shirt read 'Flying Mint Bunny Co.', and almost made Andrew burst out laughing.

"Are you Andrea Chen?" He asked, glancing at his clipboard.

"What the hell? Do I look like a fucking girl to you?" Andrew snapped. "The name's Andrew, not Andrea."

"Well, I have a delivery for one Andrea Chen at this address," The man said. "You're just going to have to take it, because this guy-" He pointed at the box with his thumb- "Will be extremely cranky if he wakes up while I'm taking him back to headquarters."

"I'm not taking the fucking package," Andrew said. "No one in this house is named Andrea Chen. I don't care if that thing wakes up, take it back!"

"I'm afraid we also have a no return policy on all units unless you call customer services. For now, this unit's all yours." The man offered the clipboard, and Andrew set down his instrument case to take it from him, muttering profanities under his breath. He signed, and the delivery man took the clipboard from him, leaving with a tip of his hat. Andrew swore again after he was gone, and stared at the box in front of him.

"Are these chains really necessary?" He wondered, and examined the box to find the customer service number. Instead, he found a manual with a first page clearly reading:

_Ivan Braginski: User Guide and Manual_

"Who the hell is that?" He wondered, and flipped through the manual, finding the customer services number printed on the back page. He pulled out his cell phone from his pocket and dialed, listening before hearing an automated voice begin to speak.

"_Hello. This is the Customer Services line for the Flying Mint Bunny Corporation. Thank you for calling today. Please listen to all your options before pushing any buttons. _

"_If your unit is malfunctioning in any way not printed in the manual, press 1. If your unit is in need of identifications, press 2. If your unit is attempting to kill or maim you or any surrounding people, press 3. If your unit came with the incorrect manual, press 4. If your unit did not come with the accessories it was supposed to have, press 5. If you received the wrong unit, press 6. If you ordered a unit and did not receive it, press 7. If you received a unit and did not order it, press 8."_

"About fucking time," Andrew said, pressing the 8 button.

"_You received a unit that you did not order. In order to direct you to the right operator, we must know which unit you received. Please listen to all choices before continuing. If you received a Feliciano Vargas, press 1. If you received a Yong Soo Im, press 2. If you received a Yao Wang, press 3. If you received an Alfred F. Jones, press 4. If you received an Arthur Kirkland, press 5. If you received a Matthew Williams, press 6. If you received an Antonio Fernandez Carriedo, press 7. If you received either a Francis Bonnefois or a Vash Zwingli, press 8. If you received a Gilbert Beillschmidt or an Ivan Braginski, press 9."_

"Jeez, they like to make me pissed," Andrew said, and pushed the nine button.

"_You received either a Gilbert Beillschmidt or an Ivan Braginski unit. Push 1 if you received Gilbert Beillschmidt, or 2 if you received-"_

Andrew pushed two.

"_You received an Ivan Braginski unit you did not order. Before we direct you to an operator, we advise that you make sure your Ivan Braginski unit has not woken up during this process, as if he has, we cannot take him back. Please wait shortly, as you are being directed to an operator."_

Cheesy wait music played through the speaker of the phone, and Andrew quickly put his ear up to the box. Hearing nothing, he figured that the unit hadn't woken up yet.

"_Hello? I'm Kris, your operator to help with your issue of receiving an Ivan Braginski unit you did not order?"_

"Yeah," Andrew said, taking a few steps away from the box so as to not wake the thing inside. He had a growing feeling that those chains weren't just for show. "Apparently the thing was supposed to go to an Andrea Chen, and I'm Andrew. I'm not a girl."

"_I can tell from your voice," _Kris chuckled, and Andrew rolled his eyes.

"Whatever. I just want the thing gone before my parents get home. They're hung over everything else I've done in my lifetime anyways, and I don't want to add this to it."

"_Of course. As long as Mr. Braginski doesn't wake up, you should be fine. Oh, and I would advise watching the box or checking on it every so often until it gets picked up. There have been incidents where a Natalya Arlovskaya unit has found an unopened Ivan Braginski unit and woken him up, so do be careful with him. I'll be sure to get a delivery person to come and pick up the unit. Just make sure he doesn't wake up. Then he's your problem."_

"I get it," Andrew huffed, slightly annoyed. "Don't wake him up, and don't let a Natalya unit near him. Simple enough. How long until someone gets him?"

"_Anywhere between three and ten hours,_" Kris said cheerily. "_Thank you for your patronage." _The line went dead, and Andrew huffed in annoyance.

"This is just fucking great. I might as well wake him up."

Andrew sat on the front porch, though, and dug out his homework, deciding to get it over with as soon as possible.

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><p>Andrew heard the girl before he saw her. She kept muttering about getting her brother to marry her and become one, and he glanced up to see a girl with long platinum blond hair standing about twenty feet away, watching the box intensely. She had a white bow in her hair and a long sleeved, royal purple dress on, and had a murderous gleam in her purple eyes.<p>

"Who the hell is that?" He wondered, and his question was quickly answered when the girl dashed towards the box on his front porch, yelling at the top of her lungs,

"BROTHER! WE SHALL BECOME ONE!"

Andrew immediately heard crying and whimpering from the box, and he let out a string of curse words that would make a sailor wince.

The Natalya unit began to undo the chains, and Andrew jumped up, tackling her to the ground and away from the box.

"Of course you would find this Ivan Braginski, of all the Ivan Braginskis that exist," He muttered, and the Natalya unit continued to glare, throwing him off of her and going back to undoing the box.

"Brother, once this box is out of the way, we will become one!" She cried, and Andrew was about to attempt to tackle her again when a voice rang out.

"Natalya, leave that poor unit alone!" A girl with the biggest rack Andrew had ever seen and platinum blond bob ran to Natalya and pulled her away from the box. The majority of the chains were scattered around the wooden porch flooring, and Andrew glared at the girl holding back Natalya. Another girl came up to the two, and she was obviously not related to the two of them, having short black hair and brown eyes behind a pair of glasses. She dressed like almost any teenager would-in a pair of jeans, a graphic tee, and converse.

"Natalya, I told you not to run off!" The short girl scolded, and Andrew watched them bicker for a moment before speaking.

"Who are you?" He asked.

The dark haired girl looked at him. "Sorry about that. My name's Andrea Chang, and these two are my units, Yekaterina and Natalya. I was expecting an Ivan unit today, and Natalya got a little too excited here."

"YOU!" Andrew snapped. "You're the reason I got this unit! You ordered it and showed up on my doorstep! Take it!"

Andrea looked at him before looking at the two units who were watching them.

"This is an Ivan Braginski unit?" She asked.

"Yeah, and I have no intention to keep a unit that was meant for you."

"But you signed for it, right?" She asked.

"So?"

"The you have to take it," She said. "Natalya, you can open the box, though."

Yekaterina released her sister, who tore into the chains and had the box opened in seconds, clinging onto the terrified form of Ivan Braginski.

"Belarus, GO HOME!" He cried, shoved her away, and ran behind Andrew and hid, clinging onto him in case he needed a human shield.

"He seems to want to stay with you anyways," Andrea said. "And who are we to deny him that?"

Andrew stared at the trembling form behind him.

"You're kidding me."

"Well, complain all you want, but he's yours. I'll be taking my leave now. Yekaterina, make sure Natalya doesn't stay here." Andrea left the porch, before turning around to say one last thing.

"If you have any questions, I'm the resident Hetalia obsessionist around here, so you can ask me. And also, you'll be getting more units in the near future, I think. Good luck." She turned and left, Yekaterina dragging Natalya along as they followed.

Once the three were gone, Andrew felt a rather intimidating aura behind him. He turned to face Ivan, who stood at his full six feet two inches tall. The Russian had a rather creepy smile on his face, and he stared down at the five foot seven Asian.

"Privet, comrade," He said. "My name is Ivan Braginski."

Andrew nodded. "Andrew Chen." He had a _long _night ahead of him, and he was not looking forward to it.


	2. Chapter 2

**EDIT- I was totally meaning to put this in before I published the chapter, but whatever. XD Um, any sentences in Italics is in Chinese, unless I state otherwise. I don't know Chinese myself, and I have a strong feeling that if I use Google Translate, it will turn out badly. So, yeah, enjoy the second chapter!**

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><p>Andrew sat on the front porch, watching the breeze as it teased the last leaves on the trees. He was waiting patiently for his parents to come home, smoking his third cigarette that day. He only smoked more than once a day when he was secretly stressing out.<p>

Ivan was inside the house in the guest room on the second floor, the room Andrew had given to him to use. As long as the Russian didn't destroy anything and cleaned up after himself, he was allowed to do whatever he wanted. So Ivan had decided to clear all the furniture out of the room and paint the walls with sunflowers, like any normal person would. Where Ivan got the paint, though, Andrew had no earthly idea.

The sounds of two engines brought Andrew back to reality, and he glanced up to see his parent's cars coming in his direction. He snuffed out his cigarette on the concrete walkway, and headed inside, climbing up the stairs and maneuvering his way around all his furniture in the hallway to his room, where he stashed his cigarette pack and his lighter. Contrary to what most people believed, Andrew was not fond of smoking in front of others, and his parents didn't even know he had the habit.

Andrew went back out into the hallway to find his parents standing on the other side of the furniture wall with looks that crossed between annoyance and curiosity.

The woman of the two- having dark brown eyes and short black hair, an angular nose, and a pair of glasses propped on them. She wore a dark business suit a pair of black high heels that looked very painful to be wearing. The man standing next to her looked exactly the same- dark eyes and black hair, a sharp business suit, and black polished shoes, but no glasses.

"Mom, dad," Andrew said.

"Andrew, is there any reason that the furniture to the guest room is out here in the hallway?" The woman- Xie Ming Chen- asked.

"Um, we have a house guest," Andrew said slowly, trying to figure out a half assed excuse for the reason the Russian would be in his house, since '_I got in this little mix up with a delivery company and got a free Russian_' didn't seem like it would cut it.

"Oh, and who would that be?" The man- Liang Chen- asked.

As if right on cue, Ivan stepped out of the room and into the hallway, looking at Andrew.

"Andrew, you're out of yellow paint," He said, and disappeared back into the bedroom.

"That was him," Andrew said, gesturing to the door with his thumb.

"Who is he?" Xie Ming asked.

"Ivan Braginski, a friend of a friend. He's from Russia." That was sort of true, right? "He needed a place to stay for a while, and I offered the guest room."

"Why isn't he at your friend's house?" Xie Ming narrowed her eyes, staring down her son.

"Nathan was out of room," Andrew said. "He's got like four siblings, and he doesn't have any extra room. So can Ivan stay here?"

Liang sighed, rubbing his temples and trying to not yell in earshot of the houseguest. He looked at Xie Ming, and the two exchanged a silent conversation before looking back at Andrew.

"He can stay, for now," He said. "Now, is your homework finished?"

Andrew disappeared into his bedroom, and the two parents headed downstairs, Xie Ming to work on dinner and Liang to get some extra work done. Ivan popped his head out of the doorway once the two were gone, and went across the hall into Andrew's room, where the teen was sitting at his desk, using his laptop.

"Do you need something, Ivan?" Andrew asked, not looking away from his task of trying to research Hetalia and Ivan Braginski.

"How did you know it was me?" The Russian asked, closing the door behind him and sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"Because you haven't started screaming at me yet in Chinese," Andrew said simply. "That, and both my parents went downstairs. I heard their footsteps."

"Oh," The Russian looked around the teen's room, observing the various posters and photos adorning the walls, the messy dresser by the door, the closet that seemed about to burst from the amount of stuff crammed into it, and the floor that was littered with papers, clothes, and the occasional video game case. "We will be getting more paint soon, da?"

"Hm?" Andrew looked up from his 'research' and shrugged. "Maybe. What exactly did you do?"

"I will show you, da?" Ivan said, and grabbed Andrew's arm, pulling him out of his seat and practically dragging him out of the room and across the hall.

"Hey, let go! Ouch! Will you- Whoa, you did this?" Andrew's complaining immediately stopped once he took in the room's walls. They had once been a bland off white, but now had fields of sunflowers painted on the walls. Unfortunately, it appeared that all the paint Ivan had uncovered had been used up, and Andrew was pretty sure that paint had been expensive paint. Oh well, at least it had gone towards something productive.

"Da," Ivan said, smiling at his creation.

"You know you have to move the furniture back in here, then, right?" He asked, and Ivan nodded. "Like, you have to move it back in now?"

Again, the Russian nodded, and he left the room, coming back with the dresser. Andrew watched as the Russian carried in all the furniture without even appearing to have broken a sweat.

"Just what are these things?" Andrew muttered, shaking his head, as he left the room and went back to his 'research' of Hetalia, which essentially just meant to watch the anime and read the manga, among other things. He also decided to look up Hetalia Units with Google, but the only thing that kept popping up were the words '_Your search query did not find any results._'

"This stupid computer," Andrew groaned, and decided to try once more when his mother shouted up the stairs,

"Dinner!"

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><p>The atmosphere of the table was tense and rigid, and it seemed like any sort of conversation would just end terribly. Maybe that was because Ivan was emitting a strange purple aura and a strange sound- something along the lines of 'kolkolkol'- because of what the family was eating that night.<p>

"Do you really not like hamburgers that much?" Andrew asked, and Ivan continued to emit the 'kol' sound, pretty much ignoring his question. He sighed, muttering something under his breath that sounded like 'insufferable brat'. He stood, grabbing his empty plate, and took it to the kitchen sink, setting it in there. He went back into the dining room and grabbed Ivan by the scarf, tugging him out of the chair and into the kitchen, where Ivan watched as the teen dug through the refrigerator for something that wasn't so... American, he supposed. Finally he came across a box of Chinese food from several nights ago and opened the container, sniffing the contents. Determining it was not harmful to ingest, he stuck it in the microwave. He dug a fork out of the drawer, and set it on the counter.

"Whenever the food's done, you can eat it. It'll probably be hot, though, so I'm warning you now."

"Spasibo," The Russian said, and Andrew went back into the dining room, swiping Ivan's plate and looking at his parents, who watched him with curious- and a bit annoyed from his mother- eyes.

"He can't eat beef," Andrew explained simply, and took the plate into the kitchen, deciding to eat the Russian's untouched food instead of throwing it out. After effectively grossing out Ivan with his methods of ingesting the burger, the Asian almost choked from laughter on the face he made.

"What?" He managed to say, swallowing the last of his second burger that night. "It was going to go to waste. It's not like it was poisoned or something."

"That thing you managed to ingest will be the death of your country's people," Ivan said, fishing the Chinese food out of the microwave as the timer went off. He began to slowly eat the food, deciding on whether or not the meat and noodles was good or not.

"Mom usually cooks Chinese," Andrew shrugged. "She's not much for our 'Western culture', and prefers the 'old-fashioned' way above all else. Sometimes it gets annoying."

"_Andrew_," Xie Ming called from the dining room in Chinese, "_Please come in here. Now._"

"She's going to kill me for letting you in," Andrew muttered, but shrugged. He left the Russian, who curiously stared after him, and went back to the dining room, where his parents stared him down.

"_Andrew, how did Ivan get here?_" Liang asked.

"I told you, Ivan is a friend of Nathan's," Andrew said, a little annoyed.

"_Then what's this?_" Xie Ming snapped, tossing a booklet that clearly read '_Ivan Braginski: User Guide and Manual_' across the cover. Andrew suddenly remembered having left it on the front porch when he'd shown the Russian Unit the room he could use, as well as-

"_There was also a box,_" Liang added. "_A huge, human sized box with chains scattered around it._"

Andrew sighed, thinking many colorful words but not saying them, knowing he'd be digging his own grave if he did.

"_Is Ivan this 'Hetalia Unit'?_" Xie Ming asked.

Andrew sighed, and nodded. _"It-"_

"_Why did you order it? You know we don't have room for-"_

"_Bullshit."_ Andrew said. "_What's that empty room I gave Ivan for then? Just to sit there and gather dust?" _

Liang stood, putting himself a good three inches taller than Andrew. "_You will not talk to your mother in that way."_

Andrew glared up at him before shouting,

"_I didn't ask for the Unit to show up, he just did! I was going to send it back, but he was woken up, and the company that he came from won't take him back if he's awake!"_

Xie Ming sighed, placing a hand on her forehead and slowly massaging her temples.

"_Fine then. Take Ivan upstairs and do anything. Your father and I need to talk." _

Andrew stormed off into the kitchen, looking up at the Russian.

"Come on, let's go out for a walk," He said, and grabbed the man's wrist, dragging him out the front door. Once they were out on the sidewalk, Andrew headed in the direction opposite of the way Natalya and Andrea had come from, stuffing his hands into his pockets and trying to ignore the amused look on Ivan's face.

"What's wrong, comrade?" Ivan asked, finally deciding to break the cold silence between the two.

"Nothing," Andrew snapped. "You can't understand Chinese?"

"Why would I be able to? I'm not Yao," Ivan said.

"But I thought... oh, never mind. You don't know what we said, and I suppose that's a good thing."

In reality, the Russian had understood _quite_ well what the family had been bickering about, but he decided to unleash his anger at a later time, since it would be fun to watch the little Asian boy squirm. Plus, Ivan was quite enjoying the way the boy was acting now.

Andrew, on the other hand, was trying to remember the place where his friend Nathan had told him he could hang out and get ahold of certain things, those certain things being alcohol and cigarettes. And since Ivan had apparently drank all the vodka he'd had- those_ had_ been empty bottles of vodka strewn on the bedroom floor, hadn't they?- he knew he'd have to get more.

"Where are we going?" Ivan asked, seeing if Andrew would respond.

"We're going somewhere, obviously," Andrew said, not looking back. "So just follow me. Otherwise, you never know, Natalya might be wandering around here."

Andrew was sure that Ivan's face had paled a few good shades, and he smiled, enjoying messing with the Russian.


	3. Chapter 3

Andrew continued down the sidewalk with Ivan following close behind, the Russian glancing around every few minutes to check and make sure Natalya hadn't suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Andrew finally stopped at the end of the street, and looked at the building straight in front of him. Ivan looked at what Andrew was staring at, and found that the building was a simple two story house that looked similar to all the other houses in the neighborhood. Andrew headed up the front walkway with the Russian in tow.

"Come on, Ivan," He said. "This is a friend's place, and I think he might have some vodka that you can have."

That got Ivan moving. The Russian was waiting by the front door by the time Andrew headed up the steps and was standing at the edge of the porch. Andrew knocked loudly on the front door, and it was answered by a guy several inches taller than Andrew with light skin, brown eyes, and short red hair. He wore a pair of jeans and a long sleeved shirt with a short sleeved band t-shirt on top of it.

"Andrew, my man, what brings you to my humble abode this late at night?" Nathan Halbert asked.

"My parents are being whiny bitches, that's what," Andrew said, and motioned to the Russian. "This is Ivan Braginski. He's the reason my parents are griping."

"Oh man, that must suck," Nathan said, and he turned to look at Ivan. "Why hello there my Russian friend. What did you do that managed to piss off Andrew's parents? Not that they're not easy to piss off or anything, but... Anyways, why don't you two come on in? I think I've got some pizza in the fridge..."

Ivan blanched, and Andrew shook his head.

"We already ate, and Ivan can't stand any type of American food, I guess. He wouldn't eat the hamburger that my mom cooked for dinner."

Nathan shrugged. "Suit yourself, man."

Andrew and Ivan entered through the front door of Nathan's house, and the first thing that Andrew noticed was that the house was actually clean and neat for once, which was extremely unlike Nathan.

"Did Jacki come by recently?" Andrew asked. "You never keep the house like this unless she's here."

As if on cue, a petite girl with olive skin and dark brown hair came into the room, smiling with shiny white teeth and sparkling dark amber eyes.

"Did I hear my name?" Jacki Adderson asked. She looked from Nathan to Andrew, and then slowly over to Ivan. "Who're you?" She asked.

Ivan stared, silent, and Andrew spoke up.

"This is Ivan Braginski, a friend from Russia."

"I thought you were Russian," Jacki said, and she gave a glare at Nathan. "You never told me we were having company!" She screeched.

"Jacki, Nathan didn't know we were coming," Andrew said, sighing, and Jacki's expression turned back into a happy one.

"Oh, well, that's different. Your parents hit you again, Andrew?" She asked. "What people think they can do these days just astounds me."

"Jacki, you sound like you're sixty," Andrew laughed, "And no, they didn't do much of anything beyond pissing me off. They got all freaked out because of Ivan."

Jacki nodded slowly, and grabbed Ivan's hand, leading him further into the house. Andrew and Nathan followed. The four ended up in the kitchen, where Jacki retrieved two bottles of vodka, a bottle of wine, and several German beers.

"Gotta love that German beer," Jacki said, setting all the alcohol down onto the table and popping off one of the beer caps. "Way better than that American crap."

"Jacki, our guests haven't even been here for five minutes and you've already got plans to get them drunk? Really, I thought you were better than that!" Nathan laughed, and Jacki smiled.

"No, Ivan wanted the vodka. Andrew, you want something?"

"Nah, I'm fine," Andrew said, and he leaned against the wall, arms folded across his chest. He then realized what Jacki had said, and looked at her.

"Ivan didn't say anything. How did you know he wanted vodka?"

"I could just tell," Jacki smiled, and went over to a drawer by the fridge, opening it and pulling out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. "Just like I know you want this."

Andrew shook his head. "As much as I'd love to, I've already gone over my limit for the day."

"You're that stressed?" Nathan asked, and Andrew didn't respond, instead choosing to stare at the back of Ivan's head, who was knocking back the vodka like the world would end tomorrow.

"Ivan, what's with you? I would think you would be talking more." Andrew gave Ivan a strange look, even though he couldn't see it.

Ivan was still silent, and Andrew had a sudden thought.

"Did you see Natalya?"

The usually very terrifying Russian began to tremble, and Andrew took that as a yes.

"Natalya?" Nathan asked, popping open the bottle of wine and pouring himself a glass before sitting down.

"Ivan's younger sister. She's part of the reason I'm in this mess.

Ivan continued to down the vodka- while being quite paranoid all the while- as Andrew explained his little "situation" with the Units and Andrea Chen- er, Chang. Jacki and Nathan listened intently, and once Andrew was finished explaining, he went over to the drawer and grabbed the lighter and cigarettes. He was already over his daily limit, so why not smoke some more?

Andrew went out the kitchen door to stand out on the balcony in the dark night. The only light was from the stars, his cigarette embers, and the faraway street lamps, but Andrew knew the backyard pretty well. A tall oak tree was in the far right corner, surrounded by small flowers and wooden lawn gnomes. On the other side of the lawn was a small garden that grew whatever was in season, so that meant pumpkins, squash, and a few other things. The only thing that was grown year-round were tomatoes, since Jacki absolutely adored the fruit. Nathan wasn't much for getting dirty in the mud, but Jacki loved it.

The door behind Andrew opened, and Jacki came out, closing the door behind her. She went and stood out at the edge of the balcony next to Andrew, and spoke.

"You know, your friend's not so bad. You just have to find the right place to start with him."

"It's... It's not that simple," Andrew said, taking a long drag.

"You just think that," Jacki said. "But we're not talking about Ivan, are we?"

"No," Andrew admitted, shaking his head. "We're not."

"Then who are we talking about?"

"It's not really a who as it's more of a what. Andrea said that I would get more Units, and just seeing my parent's reactions after one... My life is going all downhill from here."

Jacki chuckled, but shook her head, even though Andrew couldn't really see it.

"No, it's not. Listen to your adelfi*, would you? Your life's not totally messed up. You've gotten this wonderful gift of a person who can broaden your horizons and teach you more about the world you live in."

Andrew was silent for a moment before laughing.

"Really, Jacki, you're only 22. You shouldn't try to make yourself sound sixty or seventy."

"I don't try to," Jacki said honestly, and looked at Andrew. "We should go back inside. You can stay here tonight if you think it's necessary, but I think the two of you should head home."

"Yeah, maybe," Andrew said, snuffing out the cigarette in the ash tray placed strategically by the balcony door. The two went inside, and found Ivan and Nathan sitting there in an uncomfortable silence.

"Nathan, Andrew needs to head home," Jacki said, and the redhead nodded. He stood and led the two to the door, and Andrew and Ivan left towards Andrew's house. Andrew couldn't shake the feeling, though, that something was going to go terribly wrong. Terribly, terribly wrong.

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><p><strong>AN: I'm terribly sorry for the short and kind of random chapter, but I needed to be able to introduce Nathan and Jacki, since they're going to become more key characters later on. I'm working on the next few chapters, so hopefully they will updated within the next few days or so... Well, anyways, please review so I can know what my readers think! It makes my day to see the email notice that I've gotten a review, and I love all constructive critism! Thanks!<strong>

*Adelfi is the pronunciation of the Greek word for sister.


	4. Chapter 4

Andrew and Ivan headed home, walking quickly to avoid any run-ins with the Russian's younger sister, and arrived a short while later, opening the front door and heading inside.

Andrew realized something was up as soon as he closed the door, since there was no yelling in Chinese or English and nothing was broken. He went up to his room, and was more than a little surprised to find his mother in there, sitting on the edge of the bed and- Oh God, was that his lighter and cigarette pack? Xie Ming looked at her son and spoke in an even tone that sent shivers through his spine.

"Andrew, I found these in your drawer. Are they yours, or is someone using you to stash these?"

Andrew stood there silently, not answering his mother.

"Answer me," Xie Ming said, and Andrew continued to stare at the ground right in front of her feet.

Xie Ming didn't really need an answer from Andrew to know that the cigarettes were his, but it made it so much easier for her if he would just admit it.

"Oh well, it doesn't matter. I know these are yours anyways," Xie Ming glared from behind her glasses.

"Smoking, bringing an unwanted houseguest, the piercings, dying your hair, drinking; how much more do you expect us to put up with?" Andrew still stared silently, and Xie Ming continued. "You have thirty minutes to get yourself and-"

A loud crash resounded outside the room, and Xie Ming stood, opening the door to find Ivan about to beat the shit out of Liang with his water pipe.

"Ivan, don't," Andrew said, and the teen's tone caught the Russian off guard. Was that... Defeat? Whatever for?

"Why not, comrade? He called me a Communist bastard, and you and I know very well that I am not Communist."

Andrew sighed, and took the pipe from the Russian.

"I know," He said quietly, and took the pipe with him back into his room as he knew what his mother had been about to say. 'Thirty minutes to pack up and leave, since we're disowning you. We can't have such a disobedient child in our household, and you are such a disappointment to us.'

Xie Ming came back into Andrew's room, and spoke.

"Andrew Chen, as I was saying earlier, you have thirty minutes to get whatever you want from this room and leave the property. Take that Russian with you. You are such a disappointment to this family, and Liang and I will not have this type of behavior from our child."

Andrew ignored Xie Ming as she continued to rant at him, and crammed clothes, video games, and textbooks into a suitcase. He pocketed his wallet and cell phone, and tried to ignore the former parent of his that was yelling at him, but now it was in Chinese, and almost every other word was a cuss word. So he wasn't the only one in his family to have a foul mouth!

Andrew finished his packing and slung his back pack over his shoulder. He headed out the door and handed the Russian his pipe while carrying the two bags. Ivan followed, curious as to why the teen was carrying luggage, and followed him out the front door of the house. The door slammed shut behind him, and Ivan continued to watch Andrew as he set his luggage on the curb next to him and sat, pulling out his phone quickly.

"Nathan, it's me. I've got a situation... Can you come pick Ivan and me up?"

Andrew got a reply- Yes, of course I'll pick you up, man!- and hung up before turning off his phone and pocketing it once more.

"Comrade, I do not understand. What is happening?"

"We're going to have to stay at Nathan's for a while," Andrew said, and he went silent. Ivan watched the teenager for any signs of what was happening, and after a moment, he noticed it. There was a sadness in Andrew's eyes that hadn't been there before they'd gone home, and Ivan wondered why he was sad, but it most definitely had to do with his parents and the luggage.

A dark blue Forerunner pulled up in front of the two, and the passenger side window rolled down to reveal Nathan on the driver's side.

"Hop in, and we'll head back to my place. You miss us so soon?"

Andrew went quiet at that, and Ivan continued to watch in an amused but confused silence. He climbed into the car, putting his bags in first, and Ivan got into the passenger side. Nathan tried to make conversation, but the gloomy silence Andrew was in was an instant small talk killer.

The three entered Nathan's house, and Andrew disappeared up the stairs with the suitcases. Ivan watched in curiosity, and Jacki came out from the den, where apparently she and Nathan had been watching a movie of sorts. She looked at Ivan, and then up the stairs.

"You two are back awfully quickly," She mused, and Ivan shrugged.

"I do not know what is wrong either, comrade," He said, and Jacki frowned.

"This can't be good, then," She said, and went up the stairs, Ivan following behind closely. Jacki passed several closed doors before stopping at one and knocking softly.

"Andrew?" She asked, and the door opened a crack. Andrew couldn't be seen in the darkness of the room, and it was probably purposely done.

"What?" Andrew asked, his voice awfully quiet for once. Even Ivan had a hard time hearing his voice.

"Can I come in?" Jacki asked, and slowly, the door opened. Jacki glanced at Ivan with a look that said to stay out for a while, and went into the room, closing the door behind her.

The room was dimly lit with only a sliver of hall light and the orangey glow from the street lamps outside. Andrew sat on the bed in the room Jacki and Nathan had long ago dubbed as his, and Jacki sat next to him, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"Did they hurt you?" She asked softly.

"Not physically," Andrew murmured, and Jacki sighed.

"They kicked you out, didn't they? Ivan was their last straw."

"Not Ivan, the cigarettes," Andrew muttered. "Ivan was part of it, but it's not his fault. I blame Natalya for waking him up."

Jacki nodded slowly, even though Andrew really couldn't see the movements.

"It's not Ivan's fault," Andrew murmured, "But I think I'm going to ask Andrea to take him. He'll be better off with them, and... Oh shit."

"What?" Jacki asked. "Is something wrong?"

"There's going to be more Units," Andrew groaned. "They're going to be bringing more Units to the house. And my parents are going to get them."

"What are we going to do?" Jacki asked, and Andrew shrugged.

"We'll just have to wait for the next Unit to show up. Then I guess we can figure out what to do from there."

"That works for me," Jacki said, and she placed a hand on Andrew's shoulder. "And Andrew, you and Ivan can stay as long as you need to. Speaking of which, I need to go give Ivan his room." Jacki got up and went to the door. "And Andrew, you're not allowed to get all mopey and depressed because of this. They'll get over it." Jacki left the room right as Andrew gave a soft chuckle and responded.

"Then you obviously don't know my parents."

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><p><strong>Well, this probably could've been better- and longer, too, while I'm thinking of it. I'm sorry, I really am trying to make the chapters longer, but it's hard to tell how many pages you've written when on an iPod. Well, I'm quite sure the next chapter will be longer. Please do leave a review; they are much appreciated!<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**I'm sorry this took so long, and that's it's not as long as I hoped it would be... I'll keep trying for longer chapters! Enjoy chapter five!**

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><p>Andrew spent the few days sulking and staying in his room. Ivan, though, quite liked to hang around in the backyard while Jacki tended to her garden. And it most definitely was not because Jacki just happened to be growing sunflowers this fall season. Not at all.<p>

Okay, so maybe it was a little. But that wasn't the point. Jacki was... Intriguing, to say the least, and she always seemed to act much older than she actually was, which was sometimes amusing but usually annoying.

Nathan had to work- he owned a chain of Irish pubs in town- and was rarely at home. Although, even if he was home, he wasn't seen outside of his study for long.

Soon it was Monday, and Andrew left to go to school. Ivan and Jacki were the only ones in the house, and Jacki had decided that it was high time to either wash Ivan's clothing or buy him more.

"Ivan," Jacki said after breakfast, staring at the Russian sitting rather ominously at the table, "Strip."

Ivan gave her a look that read very clearly 'are you fucking mental or something?' and Jacki stared back evenly.

"Strip," She commanded again. "I've got to wash your clothes; no offense, but they really need it."

Ivan emitted his signature kol kol kol, but Jacki wasn't fazed in the least. She'd survived Nathan for almost eight years now; she could survive anything the Russian did.

Ivan was about to give her a rather rude reply when a loud knocking at the front door distracted the two.

"I wonder who that could be," Jacki mused, and she left the kitchen with the Russian trailing slowly behind her.

When Jacki finally got to the door, she could clearly hear yelling through the door, and she opened it to reveal a young Asian girl with two taller, Eastern European girls. Ivan paled almost immediately, and when the one of the European girls- the one with long hair- looked at him, he made a mad dash for the kitchen, screaming in a totally girl- manly way,

"BELARUS, GO HOOOOMMMMEEEE!"

Jacki couldn't help it, and burst out laughing, clutching her stomach as it began to ache from laughing so hard.

"Um, excuse me, miss?" The Asian girl asked, and Jacki finally stemmed her laughter to look at her.

"How can I help you three?" She asked, and the Asian spoke.

"I'm Andrea Chang, and these two are Natalya Arlovskaya-" She motioned to the girl who had terrified Ivan- "And Yekaterina Chernenko." She motioned to the other girl standing there with a worried look on her face.

"Oh, so you're the girl who got Andrew into all this trouble," Jacki said, and Andrea narrowed her eyes.

"It's not my fault that the company I ordered the Units from is so terrible at getting things right and customer service," Andrea scoffed.

It finally clicked in Jacki's mind that Andrea only appeared to be twelve or thirteen.

"Shouldn't you be in school?" Jacki asked.

"School got cancelled, since someone thought it would be an absolutely brilliant idea to light their cigarettes next to the propane tanks behind the school."

"What grade are you in?" Jacki demanded. If Andrew had started that fire...

"I'm not in high school, nor was the person who started the mess over at the middle school. Anyways, do you mind if I come in for a minute?"

"Whatever for?" Jacki asked innocently. On the inside, though, she was a little annoyed by how Andrea acted. This girl needed some serious work on her manners.

"I wanted to discuss the possibility of Andrew transferring Ivan over to me, as I was originally supposed to receive him."

Jacki was silent for a moment, and then frowned.

"I'm not going to talk about anything until Andrew is here, so you might as well leave."

"I was hoping to also see how Ivan is doing..." Andrea began, but Jacki glared.

"I believe you've overstayed your welcome here. Please leave, and take your units with you."

Andrea sighed, knowing full well she wasn't going to get anywhere with Jacki, and nodded.

"Alright, fine," She said, and dug a slip of paper out of her pocket before handing it to Jacki. "But do please give this to Andrew. It has my cell phone number and email on it, just in case he needs to ask me something."

Jacki warily took the slip.

"Well, thanks for this. Sorry for taking up some of your precious time." Andrea then turned and walked out towards the sidewalk with Yekaterina and Natalya following behind.

Jacki went back into the house, shutting the door, and headed into the kitchen, where she found Ivan hiding under the table, knees tucked close to his chest and trembling. Jacki chuckled, and bent to see his face.

"Come on," She said, "We have to go shopping."

Ivan wouldn't budge.

"Come on!" Jacki said, and stood up, going over to the liquor cabinet and getting to bottles of vodka. "I'll give you these if you cooperate."

Ivan poked his head out from under the table.

"You are a good bargainer," He said, and went after his so called 'Russian fuel'.

"Now come on," Jacki said, grabbing her car keys, "Let's go."

Andrew got home from school around five, and when he opened the front door, no one was there.

He headed up to his room, and tossed his bag on the floor next to his bass case. He then went downstairs, and grabbed a water bottle from the fridge right as the garage door burst open with Jacki and Ivan standing there, both of them carrying several bags, and Andrew looked at the two.

"Where were you?" He asked.

"Out," Was Jacki's breathless reply as she set down some grocery bags onto the counter. Ivan disappeared, and Andrew assumed that Jacki had taken the Russian shopping for clothes. Jacki finished putting the items up, and sat down at the table before looking at Andrew.

"Your friend is a piece of work," She said, and Andrew looked at her strangely.

"What do you mean by that?"

"You'll understand eventually," She chuckled, and Andrew sighed, knowing full well he wouldn't get any more of a response out of her. He headed upstairs to his room to begin on his homework when he noticed something outside the nearby window. He glanced out, and saw the familiar Flying Mint Bunny truck drive by.

"Oh shit," Andrew said, and dashed downstairs and out the front door to follow the truck to his house, where the man from Friday unloaded not one but two boxes containing units. Andrew approached him from behind, and the man turned around to the sound of his panting.

"You run a marathon recently or something?" The delivery man asked, and Andrew decided to ignore his question.

"What the hell are these?" Andrew demanded, gesturing to the boxes.

"Your second and third unit. Usually the company only sends one, but I guess they must've accidentally done a double order on mistake. Oh well, they're your problem now, not mine. Sign here please."

Andrew took the electronic signer from the man and scribbled his name down, muttering profanities in a stage whisper, and the delivery man left without another word. Andrew then turned to the boxes and sighed. He had to move these before his parents- er, former parents came home and found him here with the units.

Andrew found the manuals, and quickly scanned the cover pages of the two boxes.

"_Yao Wang: User Guide and Manual_, and _Yong Soo Im: User Guide and Manual_. Great, two Asian ones. How ironic." Andrew read the manuals quickly, reading the portion on how to wake the two up, and decided on the two easiest options.

"I have to wake up Korea first, then. I will probably regret this, but... ARU!"

"China? Is that you? You know, YOUR BREASTS BELONG TO ME, DA-ZE!" The Korean burst out of the box and immediately tackle hugged Andrew, groping him.

"Agh! What the fuck?" Andrew shoved Yong Soo off of him, and backed up a few feet. "You don't just grope random people!"

"Y-You're not aniki, da-ze?" Yong Soo looked at Andrew with puppy like eyes, and Andrew sighed.

"No, but he's in the other box there." Andrew gestured to the unopened box, and Yong Soo walked up to the box quietly, judging whether or not Yao was awake. After a moment, Yong Soo broke open the box without delay and tackle hugged his brother just like he had Andrew.

"Aiyah! W-What the hell, aru?" Yao cried, finally awake and trying to shove the Korean who was groping him away.

"Aniki! Your breasts belong to me, da-ze!"

"No they don't! Get your hands off of me, aru!" Yao shoved his brother off of him, and then noticed Andrew standing a little ways off. "Would you mind giving me a hand, aru?"

Andrew shrugged, and walked over to the two, tearing Yong Soo away from Yao. Yao then looked at Andrew.

"Thanks."

"Yeah, whatever, don't mention it. Now, we have to leave. Right now. Get your stuff, and we'll go."

"You don't live here, da-ze?" Yong Soo asked, and Andrew shook his head.

"Not anymore. Fucking parents kicked me out. Let's go."

Andrew grabbed the manuals while the two grabbed their various items, and he ushered them away from the house quickly.

They got back to Nathan's house only minutes later to find Jacki in the backyard with Ivan, tending to her garden. Jacki looked up at three as they approached, and smiled.

"You the new units?" She asked.

"Yeah," Andrew sighed, and looked at Ivan, who held an unusually large childish grin on his face. "What's up with you?"

"Privyet, comrades," He smiled at Yong Soo and Yao, and while Yong Soo didn't really mind, Yao started to panic.

"N-Ni hao, Ivan," He said, and dashed behind Andrew, Perrin out over his shoulder.

"Oh great," Andrew sighed. "Two with sexual tensions. This is great, just great. What's next?"

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><p><strong>Worst cliffhanger ending ever. D: BLEH. I will fix it! Eventually... But, anyways, do review please!<strong>


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